Mark Twain Quotes

If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything. – Mark Twain

Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to reform (or pause and reflect). – Mark Twain

The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time. – Mark Twain

A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes. – Mark Twain

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great. – Mark Twain

Mark Twain

If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything. – Mark Twain

The secret of getting ahead is getting started. – Mark Twain

Who would find out that I am a natural fool if I kept always cool and never let nature come to the surface? Nobody. – Mark Twain

Ah, well, I am a great and sublime fool. But then I am God’s fool, and all His works must be contemplated with respect. – Mark Twain

my mind changes often … People who have no mind can easily be steadfast and firm, but when a man is loaded down to the guards with it, as I am, every heavy sea of foreboding or inclination, maybe of indolence, shifts the cargo. – Mark Twain

I would rather have my ignorance than another man’s knowledge, because I have got so much more of it. – Mark Twain

My interest in my work dies a sudden and violent death when the work is done. – Mark Twain

People who always feel jolly, no matter where they are or what happens to them—who have the organ of hope preposterously developed—who are endowed with an uncongealable sanguine temperament—who never feel concerned about the price of corn—and who cannot, by any possibility, discover any but the bright side of a picture—are very apt to go to extremes, and exaggerate with 40-horse microscopic power. – Mark Twain

I am as prompt as a clock, if I only know the day a thing is wanted—otherwise I am a natural procrastinaturalist. – Mark Twain

Many a small thing has been made large by the right kind of advertising. – Mark Twain

Words are only painted fire; a look is the fire itself. – Mark Twain

It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either. – Mark Twain

The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane. – Mark Twain

Principles have no real force except when one is well fed. – Mark Twain

Denial ain’t just a river in Egypt. – Mark Twain

To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence. – Mark Twain

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear – not absence of fear – Mark Twain

The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time. – Mark Twain

It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog. – Mark Twain

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please. – Mark Twain

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. – Mark Twain

Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see. – Mark Twain

I have never let my schooling interfere with my education. – Mark Twain

You can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus. – Mark Twain

The lack of money is the root of all evil. – Mark Twain

A man’s character may be learned from the adjectives which he habitually uses in conversation. – Mark Twain

Better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt. – Mark Twain

Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well. – Mark Twain

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter. – Mark Twain

Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect. – Mark Twain

The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read. – Mark Twain

Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first. – Mark Twain

A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes. – Mark Twain

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great. – Mark Twain

Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life. – Mark Twain

Golf is a good walk spoiled. – Mark Twain

The holy passion of friendship is so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring in nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money. – Mark Twain

Its name is Public Opinion. It is held in reverence. It settles everything. Some think it is the voice of God. – Mark Twain

When we remember that we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained. – Mark Twain

Put all your eggs in one basket — and watch that basket! – Mark Twain

The secret source of humor itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no humor in heaven. – Mark Twain

Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand. – Mark Twain

The very ink with which all history is written is merely fluid prejudice. – Mark Twain

Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. – Mark Twain

After a few months’ acquaintance with European “coffee,” one’s mind weakens, and his faith with it, and he begins to wonder if the rich beverage of home, with its clotted layer of yellow cream on top of it, is not a mere dream after all, and a thing which never existed. – Mark Twain

Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect. – Mark Twain

Grief can take care of itself; but to get the full value of a joy you must have someone to divide it with. – Mark Twain

The lack of money is the root of all evil. – Mark Twain

It is better to have old second-hand diamonds than none at all. – Mark Twain

Don’t part with your illusions. When they are gone, you may still exist, but you have ceased to live. – Mark Twain

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence in society. – Mark Twain

There is no distinctly native American criminal class except Congress. – Mark Twain

When angry, count four; when very angry, swear. – Mark Twain

I have been studying the traits and dispositions of the “lower animals” (so called) and contrasting them with the traits and dispositions of man. I find the result humiliating to me. – Mark Twain

What’s the use you learning to do right, when it’s troublesome to do right and ain’t no trouble to do wrong, and the wages is just the same? – Mark Twain

All kings is mostly rapscallions. – Mark Twain

“Classic.” A book which people praise and don’t read. – Mark Twain

To string incongruities and absurdities together in a wandering and sometimes purposeless way, and seem innocently unaware that they are absurdities, is the basis of the American art, if my position is correct. – Mark Twain

The common eye sees only the outside of things, and judges by that, but the seeing eye pierces through and reads the heart and the soul, finding there capacities which the outside didn’t indicate or promise, and which the other kind couldn’t detect. – Mark Twain

In order to make a man or a boy covet a thing, it is only necessary to make the thing difficult to obtain. – Mark Twain

Whoever has lived long enough to find out what life is, knows how deep a debt of gratitude we owe to Adam, the first great benefactor of our race. He brought death into the world. – Mark Twain

Do not put off till tomorrow what can be put off till day-after-tomorrow just as well. – Mark Twain

Everybody talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it. – Mark Twain

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear — not absence of fear. – Mark Twain

Good breeding consists in concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person. – Mark Twain

Government is merely a servant – merely a temporary servant; it cannot be its prerogative to determine what is right and what is wrong, and decide who is a patriot and who isn’t. Its function is to obey orders, not originate them. – Mark Twain

The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out the conservative adopts them. – Mark Twain

There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics. – Mark Twain

It were not best that we should all think alike; it is difference of opinion that makes horse races. – Mark Twain

Truth is mighty and will prevail. There is nothing the matter with this, except that it ain’t so. – Mark Twain

The elastic heart of youth cannot be compressed into one constrained shape long at a time. – Mark Twain

The humorous story is told gravely; the teller does his best to conceal the fact that he even dimly suspects that there is anything funny about it. – Mark Twain

Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond; cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education. – Mark Twain

Familiarity breeds contempt — and children. – Mark Twain

When a humorist ventures upon the grave concerns of life he must do his job better than another man or he works harm to his cause. – Mark Twain

What a man wants with religion in these breadless times, surpasses my comprehension. – Mark Twain

I always did hate for anyone to know what my plans or hopes or prospects were—for, if I kept people in ignorance in these matters, no one could be disappointed but myself, if they were not realized. – Mark Twain

Men are easily dealt with—but when you get the women started, you are in for it, you know. – Mark Twain

We chase phantoms half the days of our lives. It is well if we learn wisdom even then, and save the other half. – Mark Twain


Mark Twain

Samuel Langhorne Clemens (November 30, 1835 – April 21, 1910), known by his pen name Mark Twain, was an American writer, humorist, entrepreneur, publisher, and lecturer. He was lauded as the “greatest humorist this country has produced”, and William Faulkner called him “the father of American literature”. His novels include The Adventures of Tom Sawyer (1876) and its sequel, the Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (1884), the latter often called “The Great American Novel”.

Leave a Reply

Scroll Up
%d bloggers like this: